Well, this is a new one for me...a friend (thanks Joy!) posted this article on f/book some time ago, and I was stunned because I have have never, ever heard of a correlation between adoption trauma and incessant chatter. I have one of these children...I have so often thought that there is something other-than-normal about this child's constant chatter at home, but I've never gone much deeper in thinking about it, and never thought to correlate it to a trauma past.
Until now. Totally makes sense. I'm stunned. This is an issue that drives Geoff and me (and our other two kids) completely and utterly mad at times. When we four or five are at home, the talking and noise-making from this child is ceaseless...really...like, really. I am often at the edge of sanity half way through the morning because of this fact alone. During the Christmas season, Geoff wore ear plugs deep in his ears, just to be able to tolerate the noise and chatter levels from this child a little more easily.
Side Note: I'm not really a fan of the large, noise-cancelling headphones that the author of the article wears - it seems too obvious to the child that they are being blocked out. By comparison, it took me six days to even notice that Geoff was wearing ear plugs because he could still hear us talking and we couldn't readily see the plugs in his ears...it just took a really good edge off of his ability to hear all of the noise-making. I remember feeling amazed, before I learned of the ear plugs, by how calm he was throughout the holidays!
Our child with this issue is completely unable to filter his/her talk and noise-making at home, when it's just family. It's almost like, without the distractions of friends or outings, there is an obsessive need to fill the air with his/her own noises. This child is genuinely and completely unable to accommodate requests to be a little quieter, and it's really not out of mal-intent on part; it's just that it's impossible. Sometimes we have to ask this child to stop talking altogether for a short period of time (5 minutes?) and s/he is somewhat able to do this as long as one of us is physically present during that time. There's just no filter, and no ability to manage what comes our of his/her mouth.
Thus, this is a very fascinating article to me...much food for thought. If true, it might provide me with a little more compassion at a very needed point.
Below is the link and the body of the article, written by Monica at her "Emerging Mama" blog.
Article: Incessant Chatter Survival Tips for Trauma Parents