Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Crazy-Making Conversations

Circular Conversation #1 (at home on a cold winter day...yesterday):

Me:  "Is it a little cold in here?  Lizzie are you cold?"

Lizzie (hugging herself and pretending to shiver):  "Yes.  Brrr.  I'm cold."

Me:  "Seth are you cold?"

Seth:  "No.  Are you?"

Me:  "A little.  Matthew, are you cold?"

Matthew:  "No."

Lizzie:  "Not me."

Me:  "What do you mean, Lizzie?  You just told me you were cold.  Are you cold or not?"

Lizzie:  "Hmm.  Yes or no, yes or no."

Me:  "Lizzie, are you cold?"

Lizzie:  "No way, not me.  Hot.  Yes, hot now."

Circular Conversation #2 (while in the car last Thursday, driving to gymnastics):

Seth:  "How long til we get to gymnastics, Mom?"

Me:  "Not long; just a few minutes."

Seth:  "No, how long?"

Me: "I don't understand."

Seth:  "How many miles?"

Matthew (looking out the van window, day-dreaming):  "Kilometres...Mom uses kilometres."

Seth:  "How many ki-no-no-meters Mom?"

Me:  "Well, I'd guess about three."

Lizzie (outraged):  "We only have three minutes in gymnastics?  Why?"

Matthew (fully alert now, outraged):  "What??!  We have to leave gymnastics after only three minutes?  Wwhhyy?"

Me:  "No, no, no, guys - it' ok.  Seth was asking about how far it was to gymnastics - -"

Lizzie (wailing):  "Mooommmmy, I want to stay long at gymnastics...why you make me leave?"

Matthew (crying, apoplectic):   "Mom! Mom! Why do we have to leave early?"

Seth (crying now, too):  "Mom, what's up?  Why we staying for only three minutes?  Don't want to go home yet..."

I've since given up on talking.  I now focus my attention on the brick wall my head is pounding on.

P.S.  It's later today and I just had to share one more (short) conversation from this afternoon:

Lizzie:  "Mommy, may I go upstairs?"

Me:  "Of course you may.  Matthew and Seth just went upstairs, too."

Lizzie (with a whine, and dissolving into tears):  "But I don't want to - I want to stay with you!"

Me (throwing my hands up in the air):  "Lizzie, if you want to stay here with me, that's fine...if you want to go upstairs, that's fine too!"

Lizzie (on the floor now, wailing):  "No go upstairs - stay with you!"

Yikes...what's a girl to do??!


  1. Lovelovelove! Laughing hysterically! Those are awesome conversations!

  2. oh my word, that is my house!! Sometimes I find it is easier to NOT point out something interesting, for example, when we are driving, than to point it out and start a big round of "where?" "there" "what?" "I didn't see it", and then misunderstandings........

  3. Thank you for that great laugh this morning!!!

  4. Um, yeah. Sadly (for me), I totally get it. But it's really funny reading someone else's examples :)

  5. Thanks...honestly, sometimes I really would be better off not talking at all...I just seem to get myself into trouble and end up having to deal with copious amounts of tears!


  6. Oh Ruth, these are SO funny! Sorry to be laughing at your expense, but.... I am TOTALLY laughing at your expense. Hilarious. Thanks for sharing!

  7. I totally get it. It is funny to read someone else's examples. At my house one kid asks me a question. Before I get to answer it another kids answers it incorrectly. Then within seconds everyone is yelling and angry about how unfair I am because of the answer they all decide I gave. Uggh.

  8. Oh, I SO TOTALLY UNDERSTAND THIS. That was like reading a script from our family -- except that in our house, one of my older girls just can NOT take it, and explodes in frustration and irritation. Every single time. Lord, have mercy on us all.

  9. Love the gymnastics story especially! Laughed out loud!!!! Love it!

  10. Thanks...the funniest part for me was having to decide which conversations of the hundreds to include in this post...cause, like you Gwen, it happens ALL day long!